Monday, October 1, 2012

Missing Home

All Rights Reserved: My daughter Skyping with her grandmother in England

Things I overheard my daughter say to family on Skype this weekend:

  • “My hands are 11 inches tall.”

  • “I have a French teacher. A sparkly one.”

  • “Excuse me. I have to itch my ears.”

  • “I have big ears and a ginormous bottom. Just wait until I come back to England.”

  • “I had a massage. And it hurted. It hurt and my body felt like I had to go to the hospital. Then they punched our backs.”

All Rights Reserved: My daughter Skyping with her BFF in America. 
  • “I’m going to tell you a secret: parallelogram and trapezoid. They are special shapes.”

  • “She’s crying. There are crying issues again.” (her bestie got a bit emotional.)

  • “Let me get Sadie so she can talk to your doll, Ellie. My American Doll misses your American Doll.”

  • “Last week I had a dream with you. You gave me a green cupcake. You wrote my name with your fingers.”

  • “Last night, I barely touched myself before going to sleep. I almost cried. Why? Because it made me think of you…are you crying?”    (Note: barely touch is something my grandmother used to do with us kids and we’ve clearly passed it down two generations. It’s when we nearly touch another person’s arm or back with the very tips of our fingers, very slowly, and say, “Barrrrelly touch. Barrrreeelly touch.”)

  • “When I move back home, maybe we can take swim lessons again.”

  • “I’m hugging the computer. Do you hear my kiss? I love you. I miss you.”

All Rights Reserved: My daughter Skyping with her BFF in America.

Two things I saw today that made me start to cry +quickly pull it together:

  • The twinkly lights of my hometown at night from the view of one of my bestie’s windows.

  • My daughter’s BFF clutching their photograph to her heart, like she was holding it with her dear life, and my daughter doing the exact same.

It was wonderful to watch my daughter enjoy her conversations with her grandmothers (on two continents), her cousin in America, and her best friend in America. Her face lit up and she was very excited to hear their voices. 

Yet, there was an underlying sadness. That in-your-face recognition of grief. Of who you love and miss. 

She was pretty grumpy the rest of the day. I think it was her way of dealing with it all...

How do you handle missing people who are not nearby? 

...sometimes, it’s really hard being away from family.


  1. Very Nice post...close to my heart since I am the one away. I have to admit, I hope my blog gives the people away from me a look into my life. Infact, I wrote a blog about that too. Missing never ends. June Maddox

    1. Hi June,
      Thank you for your comment. I'm sure the missing doesn't ever end. I read that piece you had written a few weeks ago. I really liked it. :-)

  2. Hi Becky, I know how you feel. When my boys were younger we moved from Michigan to Munich Germany for four months. They missed their papa so much! I overheard them one day playing and saying " we are pretending to play hide and seek with Papa"!! I had to hold back the tears. This was back in the day before we even had a cell phone! Fast forward to today twelve years later and we are all back in the US but the boys are grown up, one in college three hours away and the other in Michigan with his fiancé. My husband and I moved to Nashville, TN for his job. I'm older now but going through empty nest syndrome in a new state where I do not really know any one. Thank God for IPads, FaceTime, Skype and cell phones!! Keep hugging and kissing and squeezing those kids of yours! Believe it or not it really does go by fast! They will make new friends, kids are so unbelievably resilient! Being an expat is not easy at all, but neither is empty nest! Try and enjoy this exciting time in your lives! Believe it or not "this too shall pass" :)

    1. Hi Shelly,
      Thank you very much for your comment and for stopping by on my blog. :-)

      I can definitely relate to the story about overhearing your boys pretending to play with their papa. That would be very difficult. We've had several moments like that and I always feel like I got punched in the gut.

      But, you are right: kids are very resilient and there is a lot that my daughter will be learning from this experience, especially how to be flexible and adaptive. This will change her for the better.

      Thank you again for your support and kind words!!

  3. Becky, your daughter sounds amazing, and the wonderful thing is that she is with you! Cherish these times, because this too soon shall pass, and all of this makes for this messy thing call, life. :) It's funny, how we all imagine how wonderful our life would be somewhere else, never thinking about the emotional part of missing family and friends, which is huge. Thank you for sharing both parts of it, the excitement and the emotions. ((hugs))

    1. Hi Indigene,

      Thanks for stopping by + leaving a comment!

      I think my daughter is pretty amazing, but I'm super biased! lol

      I love that you said that "all of this makes for this messy thing called life." So true! It can be a beautiful mess at times, can't it? lol

      Thank you for your kind words! I'm happy you came by!


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